Dealing with Critical People
Some individuals are critical by nature and do not always realise that they are hurting the feelings of another person.
If you know a person who is critical of everything, try not to take their comments too seriously, as this is just part of their character trait. If you do take negative comments to heart it can create resentment and anger towards the other person, which could damage the relationship.
Remember, people who criticise everything or make scathing remarks to be hurtful are the ones that need help – not you!
The key thing to remember is that whatever the circumstance is, don´t respond in anger as this will cause a scene and create bad feelings – and possibly a bad image of you. Try to remain calm and treat the other person with respect and understanding. This will help to defuse the situation and potentially stop it from getting out of hand. Show that you are the stronger person and try not to rise to the bait, do not use it as a reason to offer counter criticism.
If you challenge the other person you may start an argument that is probably unnecessary. If you do feel that you may lose self-control, or say or do something potentially damaging, walk away. If you are in a meeting at work, politely excuse yourself and leave the room until you have had time to gather yourself. Even though somebody´s negative remarks may hurt, it is more harmful for you to allow their criticism to be destructive to your confidence.
Taking the Positives Out of Criticism
We all make mistakes all the time, it is human nature. As we go through life we have plenty of opportunity to learn and improve ourselves. Therefore, no matter what kind of criticism is aimed at you, analyse it to find something you can learn from it. When somebody is attacking your character it is hard to accept, but that does not mean you should ignore it.
Remember, Emotional Intelligence is the measure of an individual’s abilities to recognise and manage their emotions, and the emotions of other people, both individually and in groups.
We can improve our emotional intelligence by developing, meaningful relationships with others, improving our interpersonal skills and understanding and managing our own emotions, in an attempt to control the negative emotions of others.
