OkCupid.com says men on their dating site are more apt to reach out to women other men consider ugly rather than women universally considered pretty. Gals rated consistently attractive receive fewer messages than gals on whom opinions are split. The site’s expert mathematicians postulate that if a guy assumes he has a good chance of snagging a girl because no one else wants her, he’s more comfortable making an approach.
Thus, suggest the experts, women on the site should play up “variances” by posting photographs which make them look different rather than typical.
“Minimizing your ‘flaws’,” they advise, “is the opposite of what you should do. If you’re a little chubby, play it up. If you have a big nose, play it up. If you have a weird snaggletooth…”
I dig this line of thinking. Rather than trying to fit ourselves into boxes or align ourselves with the average folks of the land, we should advertise the extremes in our characters.
If the “play up variances” theory works for looks, it must work for smarts, too. Thus, women who date online may want to list their favorite TV shows as both Masterpiece Theater and Jersey Shore. During a dinner date, describe how your leisure time is spent circling the Golden Globe dresses you like in the latest issue of In Style magazine while listening to NPR’s Talk of the Nation.
Don’t let Mr. Right think you’re merely middle-class (how common). At dinner, order the foie gras and reminisce about discovering it during your travels through Aix-en-Provence. Then drink your Chardonnay out of a coffee mug. When the guy drops you off at home, make sure you’re carrying a brand new Coach bag while walking into your basement-level rental apartment.
If he comes in for a nightcap, fawn over Katy Perry’s last megahit but make sure he sees the Coltrane vinyls next to the old stereo. Discuss your undying allegiance to the Democratic party but admit that Palin gal “is one smart cookie.”
Finally, show you’re both intimate with yet healthily distant from family by talking about the brunch you have with Mom every Sunday. But call her by her first name.
I’ve always believed the worst thing to be is average. Conventional. Mediocre. Ordinary. Finally, there’s some evidence proving I’m right.
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When he says he doesn't know what he wants
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It’s Never too Late to Date with Dignity
